COWBOY RHYMES: COWBOYS 'N PRESIDENTS

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A WALKING CONTRADICTION

He didn't talk so softly and the stick he carried weren't that big

But the big man with the words was once just a sprig

T.R. is what the family called him

He was the large guy who was small and thin

He was a Dakota man from the East.

A New York Blue-Blood come to kill the beast

He was weak and he was strong

He was a melody without a song

Out West he was an eastern dude

In the East he was western crude

In politics he was nothing but shrewd

But it was the quiet solitude he pursued

He hunted and killed the buffalo

But helped preserve the sport of rodeo

A lilliput giant who rode a horse to the White House

A candle flame who became the nation's lighthouse

A Harvard man educated by the badlands

A bespectacled rancher with the Maltese Cross and Elkhorn brands

Partly truth and partly fiction,

He was a walking contradiction.

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BUCKEY

"Unsettled" might be the best way to describe Buckey
Of course, one might also use the term "Lucky"
That is, right up until the time he met his end
When an angry bullet blew out the back of his head

A journalist, rancher, sheriff and businessman
He couldn't settle on just one. He even tried being a politician
When war broke out, he led the Arizona company
Cowboys from Prescott, Phoenix, Flagstaff and Bumblebee

Like many of the time, he held a misguided purpose
To keep their men more focused and less nervous,
Officers should not take cover in a skirmish
Lest their reputation should receive a tarnish

Up San Juan Hill against a volley of heavy Spanish fire
T.R.'s greatest loss before the company was even an inch higher
A Rough Rider who never got to ride
A Rough Rider who only got to die

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THE TRAIN THAT CARRIED LINCOLN HOME

I am The United States, it is the name I bear

I am moving westward for all to see

I am the first and the last and I am rare

I am carrying father & son to rest in peace

Bonfires light the way ahead along the route

Forward we go, away from a darkened past

Black & White side by side, their anger mute

Until one million say goodbye, this trip will last

Under the arches and over the grief

Past mourners, soldiers and the newly freed

Slowly for track-side viewings so very brief

Past the bonfires, then back up to speed

Silent and still they lay, hour after hour

Four hundred cities and towns along the way

A giant of a man and a wilted flower

One million and more mourned that day

Banners and wreaths with flags at half-mast

Two caskets bound for a Springfield tomb

I am the train running from the past

I am the train carrying Abe and Willie home

____________________________

On April 21, 1865, the train carrying the coffin of President Abraham Lincoln departed Washington, D.C. on its way to Springfield, Illinois, where he would be buried on May 4.

While ol' Abe may not have been a cowboy himself, had it not been for him, cowboys may not have the tradition of the "Red Bandana", there may not have been the rodeo sport of "Bulldogging" and we may never have sat around the campfire listening to a Banjo picker.

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TWO BULLS (Biden vs. Abbott)

In the battle between two bulls

One is bound to win and the other to lose

When the issue is what's mine or yours

Tempers flare like all the previous wars

When one says they have exclusive domain

The other hears a threat to their reign

There are plenty cows to go around

But each bull refuses to give ground

It's not a matter of right or wrong

It's not a matter of how long

It's not a matter of who threw the first stone

It's simply just a matter of testosterone

...

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THE PRESIDENT'S CHAIR

You can't walk in another man's boots

But you can certainly sit in his chair

Wondering just who is in cahoots

And why he doesn't care

Sitting in the president's seat

One can get a better picture

Walking down the president's street

Quoting verses from the scripture

He deposes kings and raises up others

The throne of power can be abused

We are the keepers of our brothers

Even when the brothers are confused

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THE LEGEND OF BOSTON CORBETT

You have undoubtedly heard the name of Booth
Who shot the president as he sat in the theater booth
And you've heard of the confederate John Surratt
But have you heard the name of Boston Corbett?

A figure in history by accident, a legend by invention
It was he who ended the hunt for Booth by intention
Considered a hero by some and a target by damnation
Corbet was a man insane by the effects of occupation

The fumes of his trade took their toll in time
Uncontrolled urges consumed his distorted mind
To alleviate his unfounded fears
He castrated himself with a pair of shears

The signs of insanity were there and getting stonger
But that wasn't enough and he continued longer
Until he held the Kansas legislature hostage at gunpoint
It wasn't til then that someone realized his breaking point

Corbet was admitted to the home for the criminally insane
Who knows what they did there to cause him to complain
So, in less than a year, he bolted and escaped the chains
To disappear in history, never to be heard or seen again.

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TEDDY'S BEAR

Out for fun,
The fellers all had guns
A hunting trip
With a kindly tip

Don't fire
At a bear up higher
When he's bound
All around

A bear in a tree ain't rare
But tied up tight ain't fair
He wouldn't or couldn't shoot
A gentleman and sportsman to boot

Newspapers printed the caper
Soon a stuffed toy bear was prepared
Teddy's bear, ready for the fair
The President set the precedent

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CRIMSON CROWN

Can a born loser be born again?
If you were born with a silver spoon
Can you still use your brain?
Born yesterday is still too soon

Hatched, dropped, foaled or whelped
The accident of birth is living proof
Some in this world can not be helped
No matter the effort or the excuse

Born free or born to be wild
Hatched or fallen from a turnip truck
What starts out as an innocent child
Becomes nature's dumb luck

Ignored by parents and community
They learn but can not deduce
Flawed logic demands impunity
Insisting they should run free and loose

A house with an unfinished roof
Will shed no wind, nor snow, nor rain
Those who's brains go ungroomed
Are destined to become society's bane

So that we can identify all in this objectionable group
To make sure we know who to get mad at
And to keep ourselves out of that undesirable loop
Thank you Mr.Trump, for giving them all a red hat

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